Who was here
first? This question arose while I was waiting for a clerk at BenFranklin Crafts. I chose a spool of ribbon to spruce up my front door vine wreath and needed to have 3 yards (about 3 meters) measured off. I patiently watched a clerk repeatedly try to convince a man that gold ribbon would go with anything and look handsome on any wreath. The busy clerk, seeing that she might be thus engaged for some time, paged for help.
Two other women stepped up to the counter. A second clerk appeared and asked "Who was here first?". Well, I knew it was me. Boy was I surprised when the woman next to me said, "Well, to tell the truth, first this woman was here (pointing to the last woman to step up to the counter), then I was here and this woman was last (pointing at me)." I know when not to start fights, and waiting at a counter to check out is not one of those places or times to do that. People can become mass murderers in an instant. So I stood there and fumed while the first woman said, "All I want is what's left on this roll". (Looked like about 15 yards to me). So the clerk goes off to measure. We wait. The first clerk is still helping a fourth person who actually was here before me.
A third clerk comes over to help, asking, of course, "Who was here first?". I am out of control by now so I just glare at her and naturally she helps the other woman first. The other woman doesn't know what she wants. She's not sure how much she needs or if its the right color even though she has brought an actual article with her. By now I am thinking the question shouldn't be "Who was here first" but "Who has the simplest transaction?" --- which, of course, is me. Finally the first clerk is freed up and she helps me, apologizing for the wait.
I leave the store in a huff, complaining volubly to my daughter about idiots who don't know who is where first. I recall a similar experience at a bank long ago when a woman and I got into an argument over who was here first. I ended it by saying "And before that I was in Detroit!". As I mull over women who are totally blind and pig-headed, I remember the woman pointing out that she had entered the bank before me and was filling in a deposit slip before I got in line. So from her point of view she was here first. Not in line first or at the counter first, but in the building first.
I am struck by the similarity with my recent experience at BenFranklin when I recall that the woman who "told the truth" was stating a truth about who was in the ribbon department first. (BenFranklin is pretty big, she probably couldn't keep track of who was in the store first.) Definitely, from that point of view, she was correct. However, I was ready first and at the counter first and I managed to get the busy clerk to page for an additional clerk. I did all the work, I should get the reward!
I wonder how people with this frame of reference make it through places like stadiums, flea markets and shopping malls. Do they constantly keep track of the ordinal order of arrivers? If so, what do they do with their spare brains? So naturally, logically, who was here first anywhere should be reduced to who is the oldest one here. Like - - here on the planet. Or is it here in the universe?